Wednesday Wisdom | Why NOT Me? | Seersucker Sass

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Wednesday Wisdom | Why NOT Me?

I really love this photo of myself because it was taken right before everything in my life went awry.

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to hear Dr. Dara Richardson-Heron, CEO of the YWCA, speak, and she rocked my world.  To make a long and very beautiful and inspiring story short, Dara had the world on a string - she was a doctor and a newlywed - when she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  In the middle of a pity party where she asked herself "Why Me?" she realized she was asking the wrong questions.  Instead, she should be asking "Why NOT me?  What makes me think that I'm so special that nothing bad should or could ever happen to me?"  BAM.  If that doesn't change your perspective on life, I'm not sure what will.

That quote resonated with me, and I think about it multiple times a day.  

When I was diagnosed with a chronic illness, I was 17.  I had always been super healthy, with the exception of a few dance related injuries.  I was going to dance in college, there was no question about it in my mind or my dance team coach's mind.  We knew what I had to do, and I had spent the past three years working on it.  And then BAM - diagnosed with a chronic illness, spent ten days in the hospital, missed the first two weeks of dance team when I was the captain, lost a ton of hair on chemo pills, and found out my boyfriend had been cheating on me while I was in the hospital.  Life was not good, y'all.  I was a good person - I was nice to everyone at school, I volunteered at the food bank, I wanted to go on a mission trip to build houses for orphans, I was signed with a modeling agency in Miami, I wanted to be a doctor.  Why did such a bad thing happen to such a good girl like me?

When I was diagnosed with cancer two weeks after my twentieth birthday, I kept asking God why he was playing such a sick joke on me.  I was pretty, I was in a sorority, I was 20 years old, I was finally coping with having a chronic illness, I wanted to be a lawyer - Why me?  Could I not have a sense of normalcy?  

But like Dara said - Why NOT me?  Why did I think that because I was a good girl that tried to do good things that I was immediately immunized to any rough patches?  Why did I think that I was some special snowflake?

I like to think that with any kind of pain, there comes a "platform."  I lost a fourth of my body weight when I was diagnosed with a chronic illness.  Two girls that I barely knew opened up to me about their struggles with eating disorders.  One girl explained to me how my body would react when I started to gain the weight back and ways that she had gained her weight back.  Another girl told me that watching me go from being a skeleton to being healthy is what motivated her to kick her eating disorder.  I've used my cancer diagnosis as a reminder to people that cancer really doesn't care if you're a Straight-A sorority girl with great hair and big dreams; it doesn't discriminate.

The next time you encounter a "Why Me?" moment, I hope that you will think back to what Dara said.  If you feel comfortable sharing, I'd love to hear your "Why Me?" story in the comments, in an email, or even in a blog post.  I love connecting with you and hearing your stories, and I thank you for taking the time to hear mine!

XX,

SS

38 comments:

  1. Wow, wonderful story!
    One of my good friends just got diagnosed with cancer and she seems to be handling it with such positivity. I truly applaud people who can take that mindset when facing such a challenge. You seemed to handle it with grace as well after the initial shock.

    I'll be emailing you with my why me moment soon :)

    xoxo, Jenny || Breakfast at Lillys

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    1. Jenny, thanks so much for sending me your story! I am so glad that you are happy & healthy. I will definitely be praying for your friend! Xo

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  2. What an amazing story. I love the "why not me" outlook. Definitely a game changer! Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Thanks so much for stopping by! Hope that you have a great Thursday :) Xo

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  3. Oh sweet friend- you just keep inspiring me!! I had read your previous posts about your story with battling cancer in college, but I had no idea that you had a chronic illness before that! I have even more respect for you after reading that, and hearing your positive attitude through both. :-) Wow. This post honestly might have inspired me to write something personal and similar soon! Thank-you for sharing!! xoxoxo

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    1. You are so so sweet, A! I'm so blessed to know you! Xo

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  4. Wow, what a great story! Thank you for sharing and for being so inspiring! xoxo

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    1. Thanks so much for stopping by! Hope that you're having a great Thursday! Xo

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  5. This is an incredible story! You have been through so much and I hope there are many more great things to come for you. As much as many of us say we aren't superstitious, I think many of us tend to have faith in the idea of karma. Bad things happen to bad people, right? Which means good things should happen to good people. But the world doesn't always work that way, unfortunately, and I find that it's something I constantly need to remind myself of. But, I will admit, it is also the driving force behind some of the things I do. I have a huge problem with comparing myself to others and trying to be special and better so that better things will come to me. The reality is, sometimes it's just sheer luck.

    High Heels & Happy Feels

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    1. Yes! You hit the nail on the head with how we expect our karma to pan out. You are so right - hard work pays off, but a lot of the time it's just being in the right place at the right time! Xo

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  6. Girl, you are such an inspiration. I know that life comes with trials in different forms for different people, but it doesn't make it easier when you're in the middle of a personal struggle. Thank you for being so brave and honest! You've definitely been through a lot and I love the positive perspective you choose to take on life. Great post.

    xox.

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    1. Thank you so much, love! Hope that you have a great Thursday! Xo

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  7. That was an incredible touching personal story that you shared. I'm so sorry for the hardships you have had to encounter, but you seem to handle it with such grace and integrity. God wouldn't give you things you couldn't handle and maybe he's using you as a voice to other women that say "why me" or are struggling like those two girls that you helped. You're so brave and I think you're going to do great things. Stay positive and persistent!
    xo, Lauren-lee
    www.laurenleegrace.blogspot.com

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    1. Lauren-lee, thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement! You are so sweet. Hope that you are having a great Thursday! Xo

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  8. Wow, what an amazing story. You have been so brave to tell your story and inspire others.
    -Alex
    www.monstermisa.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you, Alex! Hope that you're having a great Thursday! Xo

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  9. This is such an amazing and inspirational story and post! I teared up reading.. I, too, often say "why me?!" and you're right, we need to start saying why NOT me!

    Thanks for sharing your amazing story.. you have a new reader in me! SO glad I found you through Millennial!

    xo caro <3

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    1. You are so sweet! After hearing her speak, I don't think I'll ever "Why me" again... Why Not Me is so powerful!!

      Love having the opportunity to connect with you through Millennial, as well! Xo

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  10. You are definitely a special snowflake to me! You are one of the strongest, most inspirational women I know and I am eternally grateful that I got to "meet" you through blogging.
    xx.
    Brittany

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    1. Aww, you are so sweet love!! I just love to you pieces. So glad that I can consider you a friend :) Xo

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  11. Wow, what an amazing story! Thank you for sharing this with us all.

    Bramblewood Fashion

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    1. Thanks so much for stopping by, Ashley! Xo

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  12. Such an amazing and heartwarming story! I really liked the 'why not me' approach to this! Thank you so much for sharing!!

    Denise | Fashion Love Letters

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    1. Thank you so much for reading, Denise! Hope you're having a great day! Xo

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  13. This resonates so much with me! In 2009, I had mine. A lot went wrong (in my mind), but all in all it was a blessing. I was around mean spirited and selfish people. Making bad decisions. I ended letting go of everything and that is when GOD rewarded me with MORE. Thank you for sharing your story. This really touched my heart.
    http://www.averysweetblog.com/

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    1. God really is so much better to us than we deserve! Thanks for sharing with me, as well :) Xo

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  14. This is so honest and important. That quote is absolutely amazing and we all need to take it to heart. You're so strong!

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    1. Lindsay, you are so sweet! Thank you for your kind words! Xoxo

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  15. Wow those words are so inspiring! Sometimes I think God picks the strongest people to have things like this happen to them. He knows you will get through it and then inspire others that they can too! Just like you are! :)

    <3 Shannon
    Upbeat Soles

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    1. Shannon, you are always so sweet! Reading your comments always makes my day! Hope you're having a wonderful day, sweet girl! Xo

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  16. How inspiring! I think it kind of goes back to being grateful and always remembering to be thankful you're even alive and breathing. It really puts things into perspective. Thank you so much for sharing your story!

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    1. I agree - so many people have it so much worse! Thanks for stopping by, love! Xo

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  17. I love this post. You are so strong and inspirational!
    Melanie @ meandmr.com

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    1. Melanie, you are so sweet! Thank you! Xo

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  18. Great post. This is so true. It doesn't matter who you, are, sickness, death, injury, and hard times in general can happen to anyone. It's encouraging to remember that God will work these events into a beautiful blessing. Hard to believe sometimes but true. Again, wonderful post and God bless you!!

    xo Hannah-Kate

    www.thepreppyequestrian.blogspot.com

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  19. Thank you so much for sharing your story! I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you, but I hope you are doing well now. You are an incredibly strong and inspiring woman!

    Bella Pummarola

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  20. I think I have a similar problem but mine being a little reversed, if that makes sense. (LOL) My main is just being patient. I want to just instantly jump to conclusions but I have to learn to sit back and wait before I instantly go to the "why/why not me?" part.

    I recently posted a blog about being Grateful after seeing this post and coming across an image on Pinterest. If you get the chance, check it out! http://sweet-southernsass.blogspot.com/2015/04/thoughtful-thursday-3-being-grateful.html

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  21. Wow, such an inspiring post! You're so strong and definitely an amazing role model! I have great respect and admiration for you xx

    Sarah

    https://everydayconcepts.wordpress.com/

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